Welcome to my Home
Actually...
Welcome
as far as
the door
to my Home.
PLEASE, DO COME IN.
IT'S VERY SIMPLE...
THE SAME AS ANY DOOR.
YOU KNOCK AND I INVITE YOU IN.
EXCEPT WITH THIS DOOR...
YOU KNOCK TWICE.
KNOCK ONCE BY SENDING ME A FRIENDLY EMAIL.
IF I LIKE HOW YOU KNOCKED, I WILL RESPOND.
OR I WON'T.
HOW YOU KNOCKED DETERMINES THIS OUTCOME.
IF I LIKE YOUR PARTICULAR KNOCK (YOUR EMAIL)...
I WILL RESPOND VIA THE DOOR INTERCOM SYSTEM.
(BY WHICH I MEAN, I WILL REPLY TO YOUR EMAIL).
THE RESPONSE WILL BE AN AUTO-RESPONSE.
(THE SAME FOR EVERYONE).
THEN, CHOOSE TO KNOCK A SECOND TIME...
IF YOU WANT.
(SIMPLY SEND ANOTHER FRIENDLY EMAIL).
DO THIS WITHIN THE SET TIME FRAME.
SO THAT I MAY OBSERVE IF YOU PAY ATTENTION.
IF YOU DO PAY ATTENTION, AND REMEMBER, AND...
IF IT SEEMS TO ME YOU ARE INQUISITIVE OR OBLIGING...
OR PERHAPS SOMETHING ELSE...
THEN I WILL DEEM YOU A WORTHY GUEST.
YOU WILL THEN BE BUZZED IN THROUGH THE DOOR...
TO MY HOME!
(MY HOME BEING THE REST OF MY WEBSITE).
(THE REST OF MY WEBSITE BEING THE ACTUAL STORY).
I SHALL THEN GIVE YOU THE PASSWORDS TO MY WEBSITE.
WHICH YOU CAN REGARD, IF YOU LIKE...
AS THE KEYS TO MY HOME.
A LITTLE ADVICE...
DON’T ASK QUESTIONS WHEN KNOCKING ON THE DOOR.
UNLESS THEY'RE RHETORICAL.
ASK AS MANY QUESTIONS AS YOU LIKE...
ONCE INSIDE MY HOME.
NOT THAT I’LL ANSWER THEM.
ALSO, DON’T SEND AI GENERATED FAUX-FRIENDLY SLOP.
BECAUSE I’LL KNOW…
MY HOME IS PRECIOUS.
IT IS MY MASTERPIECE.
IT HAS TAKEN ME 29 YEARS TO BUILD IT.
I AM VERY SELECTIVE ABOUT MY GUESTS.
CERTAINLY TO BEGIN WITH, ANYWAY.
I LET IN THOSE WHO I DETECT WANT TO COME IN.
EVEN THOUGH THEY DON’T KNOW WHAT...
THEY’RE STEPPING INTO.
SO, WITHOUT FURTHER ADO…
IT IS TIME FOR YOU TO DECIDE IF YOU WANT TO COME IN.
BUT, EVEN BEFORE THIS…
YOU NEED TO READ THE LETTER PINNED TO THE DOOR.
A LETTER AND INVITATION WRITTEN...
FOR YOU!
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